Starving

I did really well today.  Compared to recent days anyway.  I had my two egg whites and ketcup (41) and i had an apple (44), and i drank green tea which apparently is supposed to speed up your metabolism so you burn more fat.  I hope that helpedd.  I also had sugar free Jello (5) and 1/4 of a pickle (5).  I didn't get to eat salad because all our lettuce was bad.  So my total was 95 calories for the whole day.  Thats amazing for what i've been eating lately.

Although i've been having terrible nights of binging, i haven't really gained any weight, its shocking.  I'm at 129 still.  I think that within the next two days of eating better, as long as there are no binges, it should go down.  I'm really hoping, i want to get to 125 as quickly as possible.

I had track today, and i ran about 4 miles.  It felt really good and that means that i burned calories.  I was negetive calories for the day basically, because you burn about 100 - 150 calories per mile you run, generally, and so that means i burned 400 - 600 calories.  So i'm in the clear for today.  I will not let myself binge tomorrow, i will not.

I need to drink more water, i'm feeling really dehydrated lately because i'm not getting enough.  I'm going to put like a liter of it in the refrigerator so that i can remember to drink more.  I'll put it in like a pitcher.

I have to change my eating schedule for tomorrow because of the lettuce issue, so heres my new one:

Breakfast: 2 egg whites + ketchup = 41
Lunch: 8 3inch pieces of celery = negetive
Dinner: Cup-a-soup = 50
Dessert: Sugar free jello = 5
+ Lots of water +

Total: 96 calories.

Wish me the strength to not binge!

I am reading Wintergirls again, because when i read it the first time i was just being introduced to Ana, now that she's my best friend i think i might be able to relate more to the book and understand more.  Its my favorite book, and i'll like it more if i read it again.  Its also a really good distraction, and amazing thinspiration.  I have school and track tomorrow so its time for bed, nighttt.

Starve on,
Lacie.